On a day like today - where I have read several different blogs. I am so touched by each and everyone. I am blessed to be surrounded by such God fearing - God loving people in my life. However, there are always questions and there may not always be the answers you want, but there are answers.
I know I will probably get a lot of responses back on these questions, but hey I have to ask. So, go head and shoot your big gun at me - those words are my hubby's words so I get to use them today.
I know that if it is God's will that he will provide no matter what the case may be. However, at this time I am feeling very drawn to this subject. I must first say this is a subject that my husband says NO to every time I bring it up.
Question #1 I would like to ask how is it that so many families are able to afford multiple adoptions? Is it by grants, fund raising or what?
I would give anything to have another child - to give Mary Beth a brother or sister. However, there is no way for us to afford another adoption. We know that it was God's will for us to get Mary Beth - there is no other explanation!!!! I have been praying about this and praying about this and unfortunately I have not been given the answer by God - not yet anyway. I know that he will answer in his own way and time no matter if I receive the answer that I want - He will give me the answer. Even though I know that I still feel very confused about all of this. The ladies at our church they pick on my husband all of the time about us getting another child and his response to that is "no - I am happy with Mary Beth". They just smile at him and say well we are praying really hard for ya'll to get another one. However, I still feel that there is room in my heart for another child. Could all of this be possible???? (Yes hubby - I already know your answer)
Question # 2: Once you are a mother do you ever get over the feeling that you have love in your heart for more children? I know of several families that wish they had only had one child. They are thankful for their second, but they wish that they had stopped at one.
I know that Charles and I both are getting older and it might not be as easy to take care of more children, but hey I just look back to my Papaw when he married my Mamaw. He was 42 and she was 19 - his children from his first marriage were older than my Mamaw and then they had 4 children together. So he started a second family in his 40's. I think that if he could do it then so could I (and Charles).
I pray that God will shine his light down on me and help to explain these feelings that I have. So, if you will just say a little prayer for me or you can post your thoughts at the bottom - just click on comments below and let me know. I feel so confused and lost at this point and I am not sure what to do, how to do it, and etc and etc.
One last thing - thank you to all that have left comments on our story. Mary Beth is my testimony and I am very proud of that fact!!!!